Home > Anything Else > ‘It’s A Shame’: Military Absentee Ballots Reportedly Delivered One Day Late, Would Have Swung Election For Romney

‘It’s A Shame’: Military Absentee Ballots Reportedly Delivered One Day Late, Would Have Swung Election For Romney

The article below is satire. Per The Duffel Blog website, “The Duffel Blog serves the men and women of the US Military with a daily dose of military humor, funny military pictures, and faux news” …

DB – “WASHINGTON, DC – Sources confirmed today that hundreds of thousands of military absentee ballots were delivered hours after the deadline for them to be counted, with preliminary counts showing that they would have overturned the vote in several states and brought a victory for Governor Mitt Romney.

Officials say the ballots were delivered late due to problems within the military mail system. Tracking invoices show the ballots sat in a warehouse for a month, then they were accidentally labeled as ammunition and shipped to Afghanistan. At Camp Dwyer, Marine Sergeant John Davis signed for them and was surprised at the contents.

‘I told Gunny we got a bunch of ballots instead of ammo,’ Davis told investigators earlier today. ‘He told me to file a report of improper delivery and that the chain of command would take care of it. We didn’t hear anything for three weeks. While we were waiting we came under fire so we dumped a bunch of them in the Hescoes. We didn’t dig those ones back out.’

After military officials realized the initial error, the ballots were then sent back to the U.S. but suffered a series of setbacks.

Twelve boxes of ballots were dropped overboard during delivery to the USS Kearsarge (LHD-3) in the Persian Gulf, then while the ship sailed to Bahrain, postal clerks allegedly pocketed whatever ballots they wanted.

The remaining absentee ballots were loaded onto a C-130, but the flight was delayed until November 1st so the crew could get tax free pay for the month. Once the ballots arrived stateside they were promptly mailed to each state’s counting facility, reaching their final destination on November 7th.

‘It’s a shame,’ Rear Admiral John Dawes said when asked for comment. ‘I expected a delay so I ordered that everyone cast their votes eight months ago. It’s really unfortunate that our mail system failed us and directly affected the course of history.’

Upon hearing the news, angry Republicans have begun a demand for a recount, but most military absentee voters have shrugged off the news, with many wondering whether the care packages their families sent six months ago were ever going to show up.” Source – The Duffel Blog.

Categories: Anything Else
  1. Anonymous
    11/08/2012 at 5:57 PM

    This story is fake. Check out the “About Us” section of the Duffel Bag website:


    It says, in part: “The content of this site is parody. No composition should be regarded as truthful, and no reference of an individual, company, or military unit seeks to inflict malice or emotional harm.”

    Just FYI.


    • 11/08/2012 at 6:16 PM

      The story of the military not being able to vote itself is not fake. It’s a travesty and the polls clearly showed that most military members held the president in a less than favorable light. The truth is the president did not protect the rights of our military, nor does he have plans to do so in the future. This makes me sick. http://www.wnd.com/2012/11/defense-department-cant-put-soldiers-ballots-together/


      • ICA
        11/08/2012 at 6:45 PM

        That’s correct. “Veterans groups and soldiers advocates have warned about military disenfranchisement for years. M. Eric Eversole, director of the Military Voter Protection (MVP) Project and a former litigation attorney in the Voting Section of the U.S. Department of Justice, reported that ‘more than 17,000 military and overseas voters were disenfranchised in 2008 because their ballots arrived after the deadline and had to be rejected.’

        That doesn’t include the thousands more whose ballots never arrived or arrived at their bases too close to the election to be returned. The total number of troops affected this year could be more than double or triple that because of the relocation of nearly 70,000 military personnel out of Iraq and Afghanistan over the past year.

        More alarming, the feds acknowledged last week that a transport plane that crashed at Shindand Air Base in Afghanistan on Oct. 19 was carrying 4,700 pounds of mail — including an unknown number of absentee ballots.” (Read More at FrontPageMag).


  2. Anonymous
    11/08/2012 at 6:33 PM

    That may well be true. I simply wanted to clarify that this particular story is parody. It’s been making the rounds of the internet and lots of folks don’t realize that.


  3. 11/08/2012 at 8:48 PM

    This is why Obama is a traitor. He should have sent Airforce 1 to get the ballots. He didn’t because he was sure he would loose. He is a looser and we are bigger loosers. He is a scam. Get over it liberals who hate America you got your cheese. I never heard of such a scandalous situation. Military ought to come and stand outside the WH and protest. He should not be obeyed after this insurrection.


  4. 11/09/2012 at 7:43 AM

    Mr. Romney can now say “don’t cry for me America” after americans gave obama a mistaken victory caused by this election manipulations..another 4 years of america’s recession under obama’s care..lots of companies are laying off their employees..jobless people are all around..


  5. christina
    11/09/2012 at 2:39 PM

    They should make an exception for this! The military has a right to be heard to! Let thier votes count it is not thier faults it got there late!


    • 11/10/2012 at 6:22 PM

      The story was authored as “satire”. The events reported did not actually occur.


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